Help me please!!! I need guidance!?

Alright well this past week ive made a pretty good friend named Elion Gonzalez(), and i came up with the thought that maybe he should get pregnant!!! everyone thought it was such a a great idea that ive decidced to go with it. So i wanna know how ot get him pregnant while listening to the beatles white album, and then give him an abortion juss for poops and giggles!!!! hehehehe p.s. i think im gay no